101st Edition
Syndicated columnist, Peggy Noonan, wrote a wonderful article recently called “Signposts on the Wisdom Trail,” in which she shares wisdom from some of her personal sources and mentors, namely, Lincoln, C.S. Lewis, David Foster Wallace, and her friend’s grandmother. Her thoughtful article reminded me of a family gathering, years ago, at my grandmother Hazel’s house, at which someone made the suggestion that we should start a family business. Everyone quickly chimed in as to what role they would likely play in this enterprise. “I’ll handle sales,” my uncle said. “I’ll be in charge of finances,” another relative added. “I’m creative, I should do new product development,” someone else said. After several minutes of lively debate we noticed that my grandmother hadn’t said what part she would play in this new business formation. There was a pause in the conversation, an awkward moment, as if to signify that perhaps there wasn’t a role for my grandmother. Turning to her, someone said, with a hint of sarcasm, “What would you do, Hazel?”
“I could listen,” she replied. Grandparents do tend to be better listeners than many younger people, even if they have to wear hearing aids.
Listening is the backbone of any healthy relationship within an organization, community, or family. It seems to be a lost art today. An unwillingness to listen intently can lead to all kinds of social dysfunction. When we refuse to listen to each other, our conscience, or especially to the guidance of the Holy Spirit, we pave the way for disunity, as our hearts gradually harden to the plight and wellbeing of our neighbors and society. Naturally, we forget God’s greatest commandment to love God with all your heart, soul, and mind, and to love your neighbor as yourself.
Before we discuss remedies for this malady, perhaps we should first identify the reasons we no longer listen well. At a very basic level, in order for us to listen intently we have to have some degree of trust in the person speaking. Conversely, it is extremely hard to give your undivided attention to someone whom you suspect isn’t being truthful. If we are at all skeptical or cynical we deploy a filter which can distort the intent or even the truth within the message. As a result of a breakdown of trust we tend to tune out opinions that don’t agree with our current viewpoints. In the end we become polarized and apathetic. Is that not a fair assessment, in general, of the current climate in our society?
I long for the day when I can write about our society and describe it as one where speaking softly, listening intently, and thinking deeply is ubiquitous. Today, we have a long way to go to get there.
In the meantime, a critical assessment of our society would likely conjure up the following afflictions: dishonesty, selfishness, greed, corruption, hypocrisy, inequality, waste, bureaucracy, laziness, dependency, apathy, and false gods. Quite a list, isn’t it? Eventually some generation, led by extraordinary individuals, will decide they have had enough, and the battle against these social cancers will commence. My hope is their focus will be on the first one. I don’t think it makes any sense to tackle any of the other things before addressing our woeful lack of integrity. I’ve written about that numerous times and will spare you a regurgitation. But I just can’t see how it is possible to solve any of the other problems before committing to integrity, personally, professionally, and in every aspect of society. Sure that’s a tall order, perhaps even wildly idealistic, but we have to start there, don’t we?
Meanwhile, our country is likely to face at least two more generations of social and moral decay. I sure hope I am wrong, but the current trends do not lean in that direction. Most are steadily getting worse. Perhaps our most significant problem is that our country is a victim of its own greatness. In our relatively brief history America has created more wealth than any country in history. We are the envy of the world in many ways. The leader of the free world, the land of hope and opportunity for oppressed people around the globe. Even if our standard of living has peaked, which it undoubtedly has, it is unlikely to plummet. We will still live at a higher economic level than most of the rest of the civilized world. It’s not hard to see why apathy will grow more pervasive in tandem with our gradual decline in morality and social cohesiveness. We will adapt and learn to tolerate continual decline, as we become insular, isolated, and spiritually numb. Great societies die slowly, don’t they? That is America today.
But someday, one person, then one small group, is going to start the recovery. I hope I am alive to see it, but at age 65, I don’t think I will live long enough. It would be an absolute blast to write about. Such a blog might start like this…
Shenandoah Valley University opened its doors today to long lines of students who will become the first class to attend this dynamic and life-changing university. Situated in Western Virginia, on land donated by a consortium of leaders in business, religion, and professional sports. This innovative university is dedicated to teaching servant leadership, in a Christ-centered environment, while being committed to personal integrity and social responsibility. With billions in private donations, SVU will offer world class facilities in multiple disciplines including medicine, business, and various social sciences. Leading-edge research and athletic facilities will be available to all students.
Four years later… The first graduating class emerges. Intellectually refined, morally resolute, and dedicated to building the Kingdom in all they do. Just what will these amazing servant leaders accomplish? Will we listen to them? I can’t help but wonder.
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Michael Kayes
*These views are my personal opinions and are not the viewpoints of any company or organization.