111th Edition
Pope Francis and contemplating eulogies
Jorge Mario Bergoglio, known as Pope Francis, recently passed away at age 88. He was the first Jesuit Pontiff and the first Pope from Latin America. His passing has led to several interesting postmortems about the controversial pontiff. He is certainly getting mixed reviews. That sounds strange doesn’t it, for a Pope. But maybe not. Shouldn’t everyone receive mixed reviews if we are going to accurately summarize that person’s life work? We all experience victories and defeats, moments when we add value to the world and moments when we detract, if only by a random act of unkindness. Most eulogies highlight a person’s significant accomplishments. Seems appropriate, but I’m wondering if there is something missing in these condensed, highlight reels…
As the varsity boy’s head coach, at a local Christian school, I recently was asked to put together a two-minute video highlighting our recent basketball season. At first, this seemed like an impossible task. A two-minute tribute for an entire basketball season? I was well aware that many hours alone could be devoted to discussing our approach to offense, or why we preferred man-to-man defense. Moreover, to share all the amazing life lessons that are invariably learned during a single season would take an exorbitant amount of time.
There’s a humorous story about a young John Madden (NFL Hall of Fame football coach) attending a lecture given by legendary coach Vince Lombardi. As Madden tells it, he shows up overconfident, believing he already knew a lot about coaching football. Lombardi proceeds to spend four hours talking about a single play, the vaunted Packer Power Sweep. At the end of the lecture, Madden, realizes and admits, “I didn’t know anything.” In today’s sound bite-driven, attention-deficit world, are we moving too quickly, thereby missing the magic of the moment?
We learn the true essence of an individual in moments when time stands still. When there is a heartfelt connection between two people, an indelible memory is often created. It might not involve anything particularly noteworthy. The details may not end up in a future eulogy.
In a basketball season, these moments happen all the time. I’m sure they happen in football and other team sports, too. When a reporter asked Coach Wooden (who won 10 basketball championships in 12 seasons at UCLA) what he missed most after he retired, he said, “I miss the practices.”
I never met Pope Francis, or any Pope for that matter. I went to the Vatican once. It was too crowded for me. I bet for those who did get to meet the Pope, especially devout Catholics, it was an experience they will never forget. Perhaps he inspired them or strengthened their faith in some way. Maybe they felt the power of the Holy Spirit working through him.
I did talk to Arnold Palmer once (his nickname was “The King,” by the way) and he looked me right in the eye when he spoke to me. Like no one else mattered for the brief moment we conversed.
Eulogies of accomplished individuals are written to savor achievements and there is certainly nothing wrong with that. But it is the people in our lives that show us unconditional love and grace that often creates a more lasting memory. Again, details of which may not be found in a future tribute.
Our basketball season was one of overwhelming adversity. Two players transferred. Four key players got injured. We had to resort to Plan B, then Plan C and D. But we persevered. Players stepped up, embracing roles they could not have imagined at the beginning of the season. They coped and adjusted, cried and laughed together through a season of challenges. They leaned on each other as well as their faith and families. Facing an uncertain future, we stayed in the moment, redefining what being a teammate was all about. They learned that friendship is more valuable than statistics. Compassion, more cherished than victories. I tried to fit in as much as possible of this unforgettable experience into my two-minute video.
Somewhere in my future eulogy, I hope these words appear – “The day I met him was a day I’ll never forget… There was a real connection between us. If only just briefly.”
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Michael Kayes
*These views are my personal opinions and are not the viewpoints of any company or organization.